Gone, Daddy, Gone

To set the record straight, we don’t use a turkey baster. That said, I am currently basting in the good stuff and facing 2 weeks of unbearable waiting/wondering/divining.

Our donor, we’ll call him E1, flew in on Tuesday and was gone by Wednesday night. The situation is unusual (even for a donor situation) because we tried only once before with our friend E1. It was May of 2009, and, obviously, it didn’t take. Since then, we have all realized the constraints of him being an out-of-state donor. So this was our second and last insemination with E1.

Why the long break? Do I have all the time in the world?

No. I’m 34 and already feeling like a different woman reproductively than I was just a couple of years ago. The reason for the delay is that my dad, who had been suffering with the repercussions of dementia and stroke since June of 2008, was clearly beginning to fail this past summer, and I took it hard (I spent most of 2009 in a panic attack). He died the day after Thanksgiving at the age of 71.

Knowing that I will not be receiving “the call” (saying that my dad died) any minute of every day, I am able to finally grieve. It sucks, unimaginably. But I am finally ready to commit to this process until we gets us a baby.

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(Disclaimer: No men were harmed in the making of this blog.)

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